"i can't stop thinking about..."

some of the culprits behind the fact that my sentences often start like this

Lists and year-end roundups are kind of ridiculous and I am very impressed by people who are able to tie up the year in a nice bow and reference a bunch of things I had long ago forgotten or would attribute to several years ago. The only form of roundup I have total confidence in myself to manage is articles (this one) and maybe books (dependent on how close I cut it on hitting my reading goal).

This list contains the articles that have haunted me, kept me company, made me feel seen, evoke deep sighs or long screams, provided a different angle, stunned me on a sentence level, and/or prompted me to question everything. These are the pieces that I’ve spent all year citing in conversation and frantically texting my friends hoping they’ll read them and feel the same way. There is no order to this list. Most were published this year, some I only found/read this year.

While I do not believe in soulmates in any romantic sense, I do sort of subscribe to the idea applied to media consumption. I believe there are certain pieces of art, music, literature, “content,” etc. that find you at the perfect time and resonate with you in a borderline spiritual way. It’s about the craft of the piece itself as much as it is about you, the very specific person engaging with it at that particular moment. To varying degrees, that’s an element I thought about while making this list.

I’m sure I’ve forgotten a few, but I tried my best. I will also quietly note here that these are my two favorite newsletters I wrote here: some queer thoughts & what if academia but better. I will try to be more consistent next year! (She exclaims, predictably and with mild doubts but moderate optimism as well.)

If you end up reading any of these, please let me know what you thought! And of course, please send me any articles you can’t stop thinking about!

—

long love by Helena Fitzgerald

The Joy of ‘Calm Technology’ by Charlie Warzel

How to Show Up For Your Friends Without Kids — and How to Show Up For Kids and Their Parents by Anne Helen Petersen

who's afraid of amber heard? by Rayne Fisher-Quann

Caring Is All We Seem Able To Do by Tressie McMillan Cottom

The Money Is In All The Wrong Places by Kelsey McKinney

Effective altruism is a political nightmare by Jon Ben-Menachem

Home is Where Your Best Friend Is by Mira Jacob

My 4 Days in Fake Gay-Conversion Therapy by Jason Anthony

The Subversive Joy of Being a Single Mother by Lyz Lenz

Fuck Puritanism by P.E. Moskowitz

Why Forced Addiction Treatment Fails by Maia Szalavitz

One Weird Trick To Forget about The Housing Crisis by Jia Tolentino

I Left My Career in Prestige Media Because of the Shitty Men in Charge and They Are Still In Charge and Still Fucking Up by Jennifer Barnett

Motivated Reasoning: Emily Oster’s COVID Narratives and the Attack on Public Education by Abby Cartus and Justin Feldman

My Depression Is Selfish — and Yours May Be, Too by P.E. Moskowitz

The school shooting generation grows up by Marin Cogan

Are Better Things Coming? Inshallah. by Abdullah Shihipar

The Crane Wife by CJ Hauser

On Self-Respect by Joan Didion

I’m a Longtime Union Organizer. But I Had Never Seen Anything Like This. by Vanessa Vaselka

Doctors Who? by Jules Gill-Peterson

The Diminishing Returns of Calendar Culture by Anne Helen Petersen

The internet is already over by Sam Kriss

The Curious Case of Gina Adams: A “Pretendian” investigation by Michelle Cyca

the pain gap by Rayne Fisher-Quann

The Professional Try-Hard Is Dead, But You Still Need to Return to the Office by Delia Cai

On Liking Women by Andrea Long Chu

Are you a baby? A litmus test by Haley Nahman

“You Know What I Say About Men Who F--- Asian Women?” by Elaine Hsieh Chou

You Can’t Ignore Politics by Chris La Tray

Confessions of a Perpetually Single Woman by Morgan Parker