cleaning out the drafts
bits and bobs from the year i didn't newsletter that i still like but don't want to expand upon
“I’ve spent a lot of my life ~in anticipation~ of something. Just wait until _______, and then I’ll be happy. Life will be good. In that blank, for me personally, I could put graduating high school, graduating college. A lot of being a child is dictated by milestones and structured stages of life, making this anticipation very natural. But upon graduation from college, via YouTube video of adults telling us “we’re so proud and you’re gonna help fix the world!” (which I know was intended as inspiring but I found infuriating), it felt like powering through the last miles of a lengthy run only to find a cliff at the end instead of a finish line.”
-
“A couple nights ago I emailed myself a reminder. I do this pretty often, usually articles I find on Twitter that I want to read later or thoughts/ideas I think I’m going to forget.
This time, the subject line was: “I feel emotionally like an overturned turtle”
The body of the email was “Soft belly up.””
-
“People are out here throwing around the phrase “post-pandemic” or “post-COVID” and then going “ok, not post but you know what I mean” and I do know what they mean but also does saying it like that make it easier to forget all the people still vulnerable?”
-
“I feel like I am wearing milkshake-duck-colored glasses.”
-
“I have always tended to idealize the past to a fault; I’m a complete sucker for nostalgia. There are times I know I was unhappy during, but I look back and reminisce and miss them all the same. If the rosiness of rose-colored glasses could be measured, mine are extremely rosy. I get attached to the idea of things and I become upset with the fact that I cannot return to that previous version of myself, to that previous version of my relationships to other people and to the world.”
-
“Is happiness in life consistently achievable, and should that be what we are striving for? Obviously people have experienced happiness throughout human history, but it wasn’t the Ultimate Measure that we raise it up as now. I am not here to argue that you shouldn’t be happy, or try to be happy. This might just be about my dislike of self-help and positivity culture.”
Some Content I Recently Consumed (and Would Love to Discuss!)
“You Know What I Say About Men Who F--- Asian Women?” by Elaine Hsieh Chou. I recently read her novel, Disorientation, and won’t shut up about the fact that I’m so excited someone has finally taken on the challenge of critiquing the White Male Asian Female (WMAF) dynamic. But this article is about how white women have contributed to the flat and often sexualized portrayals of Asian women in media. The tropes are interesting to reflect on.
The film Good Luck To You, Leo Grande (on Hulu) starring Emma Thompson as an unfulfilled, straight-edge former religious education teacher trying to live a little and finally have satisfying sex. She hires a younger male escort (Daryl McCormack). Fun, gets its points across in a smooth and not preachy way, good chemistry.
“The Gerontocracy of the Democratic Party Doesn’t Understand That We’re at the Brink” by Jamelle Bouie gets at a common frustration with the Democratic Party in such a succinct, historically grounded way.
“The Case for Lunch” by Anne Helen Petersen, on sad desk lunches and the way work seeps into every minute of our lives if we’re not careful. I didn’t know the idea of a lunch desk ban even existed until this.
The song “GROWING UP IS ____” by Ruel because growing up is indeed ____!